November 26th, 2006

D-day

Disappointment Day


I really haven't felt like talking these past couple of days. Especially in light of the rather disappointing news concerning Micah's visit. I admit, I'm struggling.

I find it hard to continue on in spite of all the disappoints I've experienced over the last year. Sure, a lot of good things have happened.. but so have a lot of bad things. I'm tired of having one disappointment after another. Tired of having one thing fall apart after another. Tired of dreaming, only to have those dreams taken away.

Even in spite of the disappointments, I'm trying to remain optimistic and believe that God will take care of everything. It's hard though.

I don't know what the future holds.. and that scares me.. I've been looking forward to this more than you could ever know. So many hopes and dreams and plans. But none of it is going to happen. At least, not now. I don't know when it is going to happen.. IF it is going to happen.

Micah says that it WILL happen, just, later than we planned. I just find that hard to believe right now. Call me a pessimist. Call me a realist. Call me a woman.
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